To be able to see inside of yourself, to pay close enough attention to your mental movements that unconscious tendencies slowly become clear, is an act of love for yourself and for those around you. What makes relationships work, even when we ourselves are so imperfect, is self-awareness.
Love is freedom while attachment is control, all human beings walk in as a mixture of both when they enter into relationships. But human beings are complex, and we carry the baggage of survivalist tendencies that we gathered during tough times. Love is so powerful because it is simultaneously hardy and elastic, it takes on the form it needs to bind people together in a wholesome and nourishing manner. Love itself has many synonyms: mental clarity, compassion, selflessness, flexibility, acceptance and understanding. In this sense, attachments represent our inflexibility.
Our attachments are often molded by the hurt we have felt in the past. Attachments, our craving to have things exist in a very particular way, are the rocks that clog up the mighty flow of love. One can feel love for another, but also have a variety of attachments that block their appreciation for the amazing connection that is right in front of them. A person can be in love and also unprepared to care for that love.
It is easy to blame love itself for the hurt we feel, but all love does is open us up the hurt itself comes from the heavy conditioning and ill-fated patterns that stop us from showing up in a compassionate manner. Love is interrupted by the pain we carry.
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